Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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