Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(325): View more from Texas

she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

I hope mine doesn't look like that

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(714): View more from California

Ikea night.

(949): View more from California

?

(714): View more from California

Insert tab A into swedish slot B

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

I feel like half our conversations start this way.

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(281): View more from Texas

So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"

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(509): View more from Washington

she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.

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(813): View more from Florida

He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.

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