i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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