exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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