I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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