hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
