oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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