That's when you crack a 10am beer
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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