Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
