The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
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