You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
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