what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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