I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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