help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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