Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize