I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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