god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
