youre lurking in front of me
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
