just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
