I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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