you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize