Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
...so i touched it.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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