Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
