I think im going to throw up on grandma
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
