I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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