Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
