I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
