Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
