I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
