I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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