i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
