So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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