you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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