Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
