It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
