Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize