Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
