Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
