Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
PANTIES FOUND
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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