In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
