Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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