The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
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I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
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We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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