I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize