Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
