Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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