I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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