I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?