I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
