so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.