The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick