This girl is more easily done than said...
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
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